The Real Housewives of Potomac Recap: Honesty Is the Best Policy

Now that we are roughly a third of the way through this season, I feel comfortable stating, without qualification, that I think Potomac is well on its way to getting back on track after a nearly unwatchable season eight. There are still some rough edges, and the Mia-size speed bump is creating unnecessary potholes in a much-needed rebuilding season, but not only is there a visible path through the trials and tribulations of the last few years, but just off into the horizon, if you squint, you can see a road back to the show’s early heights.

A big piece of it is that the cast, old and new, clearly committed to delivering entertainment. The No. 1 rule of Housewives is that every on-camera fight is secretly a meta struggle over power dynamics in the show itself; the second rule is that no individual Housewife (and subsequent alliance) can ever be bigger than the show itself. The pendulum must be left free to swing back and forth, because the shifting dynamics are what ultimately makes a compelling program. Whether consciously or subconsciously, the current cast seems to understand that.

Let’s start off with Jassi, who is coming off of a rough week under the spotlight. Jassi’s story is clear: WAG for an NFL journeyman in the midst of family planning and a career transition from being a flight attendant to a full-time reality star and kept woman. As we all realized by listening to her tell seven different versions of the story last week, her narrative isn’t tidy at all — similar to her partner, it sounds like she was part of a roster of her own and was only recently upgraded off the bench to a starting position after her fiancé was done impregnating other women. It certainly seems embarrassing for her to flaunt her love life and not be comfortable with how it started, but as Karen Huger shows us, at times the best defense is simply being able to redirect the conversation. Jassi follows her mentor’s strategy to a tee by playing up her partner’s access to D.C. circles due to winning a national title, throwing a party as the next all-cast event.

It’s a smart play that temporarily takes the heat off of her and pivots the emphasis to the newcomers at a group outing, from Kiearna and her beau to Stacey’s “special friend.” At Jassi’s party Kiearna has one agenda only, which is to clear her man’s name on-camera. She practically beelines to Mia to address the conflict, but I fear that Kiearna did not quite land the result she was going for. While she makes clear that her current partner was very much not involved in illegal pharmaceuticals, Kiearna is still a little too easily led by emotions versus a proper war of wits. The entire time she’s getting her point across, Mia slides in counterpunches about her man “clearly” being a social worker and Kiearna still failing to deny any association with narcotics, past or present. This ultimately comes out as a draw, largely due to Kiearna still not having a handle on how to control an on-camera argument.

Stacey, on the other hand, is deceptively adept at working the camera, and I think this episode is a great example of that. This week, we see TJ and her having a very chaste “date” and explaining more of TJ’s adherence to his religious principles, which include no sex or drinking. That’s all well and good, but my questions go a bit further. Stacey is making it clear that she is falling in line with a celibacy commitment because she loves TJ and is choosing him, and while I think the women are addressing it poorly, I also think it is worth challenging Stacey on whether she really knows what she wants after such a long marriage, or if she is clinging to proximity and convenience. There are so many open questions for me — how does someone with such strong faith convictions navigate Hollywood and reality celebrity, which are magnets for vice and sin? Strong relationships come from friendship, but how can you really commit to a man who is only in town around once a month? Stacey is doing a good job of “being transparent” without addressing how she is really feeling about this transition in her life. For now, I will respect the deflection, but I do wonder when it will start to run thin with the cast.

We also finally get to see Ashley open up a bit more beyond reminding us that she is getting divorced sometime this century. The most relatable struggle that Ashley has is that of an eldest daughter and first-generation college student, one who is clearly the main provider for a family that she cannot lift out of working-class struggles on her own. Her frank conversation with her mother lets us see a side of Ashley that makes her, while not necessarily overall likable, someone you can have empathy for. Her mother is still working 12-hour days, living with a man who does not support her, and having recurring health issues. On top of that, Ashley has gone through stretches of supporting her siblings at different points in her life, which is clearly a burden that weighs on her. While I don’t think viewers’ perceptions of her will change anytime soon due to her penchant for stirring up mess at a moment’s notice, I hope she realizes over time that these sincere on-camera moments showing her as someone who has tried to build a life for herself and her family with what she felt were the best resources available to her create room for a lot more understanding to come her way. Speaking for myself, that is certainly a narrative that resonates.

Similarly, Wendy is organically opening up about tensions that we have known about since her debut on the show: her family not being on speaking terms with her in-laws. It has been a topic of discussion every season in one way or another, and I am frankly shocked that it has taken five years for Wendy and her family to figure out a healthy and authentic way to talk about a path towards healing. I am glad they are addressing it and showcasing that it hasn’t been an easy journey — her mother is still skittish and indignant about it all, while not all of Eddie’s family is ready to come to the table just yet. The progress, however, feels real, as does the relief being shared by Wendy and Eddie. This is my third time saying it this year, but it really does feel like Wendy found the right groove for her on reality TV; here’s hoping it sticks.

Probably the most shocking turn of events comes from the Grande Dame. I have been pretty hard on her for choosing to take the most aggressive route, which she continues to an extent in her retaliation against Mia by doubling down on the opioids accusation (which production thankfully backs up with video footage this week). For the record, I think Karen was within her rights to whip this out, though Mia insists that she was just in the hospital for an overdose and detox (it was a multiple-week stay by her own admission) and then went straight to chiropractic help (a pseudoscience at best, a dangerous hack that can leave you seriously injured at worst — although I have had some adjustments that have seriously changed my life). What’s becoming clear to me is that Karen is not really taking issue with “being held accountable,” whatever that means in the world of reality television; she is infuriated that Mia is attempting to use this moment to usurp her place in the hierarchy while having a personal life that is a walking billboard for unchecked chaos. Karen is refusing to take the power grab lying down, going so far as to directly confront Mia at Jassi’s event over what she rightfully calls out as targeted attacks against her.

However, when Karen sits down with someone with whom she doesn’t have her guard up — namely her cousin — she opens up in a way we rarely see on the show. I generally roll my eyes when she runs to the “grief” point, but when Karen lists out her crises back to back, I come away with a different picture of the Grande Dame that is more of a tragedy than she seems willing to admit just yet. She came on the show prepared to sell a specific image of herself as married to the “Black Bill Gates” with the lifestyle to match, and most of the trappings of that image disappeared in short order: The money was gone due to tax debt, the house was gone in order to stay liquid, her parents declined in health as her finances and marriage were going to hell, and she was trapped in the image she presented of herself as her biggest asset, turning her brand into a comedic farce. Once she stopped being able to lie, she sold the lie itself and turned that into a bit. She’s now the seasoned anchor of a television show and the main breadwinner in her household, but she has certainly sacrificed a lot to get there. Put that way, her condensing it to “grief” makes more sense, although it still isn’t an excuse for drunk driving. Hopefully the river of tears from a family member who was on the phone as she had the accident can be the wakeup call she needs to get her behavior in check, whether it is through rehab or another coping method.

That scene with Karen’s cousin provides much-needed balance to the tirade she has been on, but unfortunately, Mia has not heeded the same cue. Whenever Mia enters the frame, cacophony is guaranteed to follow her like a shadow – and this week is no exception. Gordon is understandably miffed at the proposition of showcasing a healthy coparenting dynamic that doesn’t exist and would only be in service of Mia’s new relationship; Mia feels that Gordon owes her this after all she endured over 11 years of marriage. I am empathetic to the reality that Mia and Gordon’s relationship was probably a lot more arduous than she ever let on and that his mental health took them to some dark places (I have not forgotten Mia saying that Gordon locked her in a room once), but if Mia wants people to understand the choices that she is making, she will need to figure out how to be more transparent about that. Otherwise we are just all watching with our brows permanently furrowed, wondering why the hell we are hearing this twisted trio talk about an alleged affair Mia had with Inc that resulted in an abortion like they’re discussing unpaid parking tickets.

See you all next week!

Cherry Blossoms:

• In Ashley’s sitdown with Gizelle, she goes on and on about olive oil and lemon juice. Is this the soft launch for GNA wellness – off-brand GOOP-style gimmicks and trends that keep you on the toilet? Inquiring minds would like answers.

• I never understand or care much about what, exactly, Gizelle knows about Jamal’s personal life. The man just got remarried to the fiancée that they revealed this week, and it looks like something out of someone’s poorly delivered attempt at Wicked promo. But Gizelle’s quick quip about needing Jamal to stay in good graces at New Birth genuinely made me chuckle – she may not ever have had a good grasp on his personal life, but she certainly knows damn well where her alimony check is coming from.

• I know a few of y’all were asking me who the hell Vivien was — she was in this week’s episode! I think her initial role as friend-of has been played more to the background. Too bad, so sad.